Job Searching

The Lab Technician position is still being debated upon. I emailed to see if they had forgotton about me. It had been more than two weeks and I wanted to make sure that I hadn't gotten the job so I could comfortably move on. Lizz emailed me back yesterday and told me that they are still working on it, and I should know either way by this weekend. It's nice to know, even if I don't get it.

I was called about working at the hospital as a transport assistant last week. Unfortunatyely, he called me during work, so i had to call him back the next day. He didn't answer, so I left a message. He didn't call me back 'til Saturday morning, when I was working again, to say that he was scheduling interviews that day. Called him back, no answer, asked him if there was any other day, as I was working all day. Then finally, the last message: he wanted to know if I could come in after work for an interview. He answered when I called him right before I was about to leave work. He said to just come in and not worry about being in scrubs and smelling of dogs as "it's not a 3-piece suit job" anyway. Okay then.

It went well, was very informal. I'm assuming that he has many other suitable people interested in the job as well, so I can't see why I would get the job over them, but we'll see... The reason I *really* want this job of patient transporting is because I would be in a union. I'm sure there are some negative things about unions, but I would start at a higher rate than most jobs, I would get regular pay increases, and I would get free medical benefits. The people that I met in the break room seemed very easy-going, friendly, like your typical college-age students. I could pick up extra shifts if I wanted and I would get to choose if I wanted more hours if there's an opening, before the general public.

Wouldn't it be great if I got both jobs? Though, they never told me how many hours the lab tech one involves. She said something about "not full days" and "two days of weaning, two days of data, one day of something else." So what's a regular "full" day? Eight hours? So around six hours a day? Five days a week? I think I would choose the transport over the lab, but if I was offered both, it would be awesome if the hours were so that I could take them both. The only thing keeping me at the animal hospital are the boarders, of course. And Ian. And the feral cats.

It's not that I'm unhappy there. But I do feel as if I've reached the limit in what I can learn and offer. Though I consider myself to be more attentive to the animals' needs, I cannot work there forever. Simply put, I can't support myself on their wages alone. Fortunately, most animals that come to the hospital, whether for medical attention or for boarding, are not going to stay there for lengthy periods of time. They'll go home, and life will resume as normal. I worry about Ian, though. Who will give him any attention if I'm not there? Once a week is not enough. He can't be isolated from people and animals like this forever. He loves playing with Milton, the grey foster cat that's there. He loves spending time with other animals. He loves being with people.

I was thinking that when I moved out, if I made enough money to buy his food, I would try to take him with me. But if I move in with Michele, she already has three cats. And I don't think T's mom would want me to bring in *another* cat on top of six cats. Moving in with Michele seems like the easy thing to do. She needs a roommate, we like each other, keep to ourselves, work a lot... The cats would be interesting, but we're not stupid. We wouldn't throw them together right away. Anyway, I don't know what to do about Ian if I leave the hospital. Or the cats...

Job Interview Tomorrow

The title says it all. I am, of course, feeling apprehensive. I'm not good with oral tests, and that's what an interview is. Give me a half hour with a pen and paper and I will answer all your questions, but orally? I don't do the best.

My body tries to shut down on me when I am anxious. I feel tired, bored, jittery. I just want to sleep. But I have slept months away before and am now aware that is *not* the way to go about life. Because when life ends, do you want to think "Sleeping was great!"? No. B/c "sleep" is all you do from then on. In a way. (Not sure what I believe on the after-life yet...)

The Feliway that I ordered online came yesterday. I sprayed it liberally on my bed and blankets. I debated between the spray and the diffuser. The spray is cheaper, but the diffuser spreads it about more effectively. Which lasts longer? The diffuser is supposed to last a month. I should buy a black light. B/c if Mellie is peeing anywhere else, I think I might go ahead and buy a diffuser. But right now, it's just the bed, so maybe the spray will help.

I'm just confused. I know that Feliway is supposed to help with anxiety, which makes sense, but I'm not sure if it will help in my case. B/c Domino ambushing Melian in the litterbox is probably not due to stress, but b/c he doesn't have enough room to play/doesn't have someone to play with. He wants to play with Mellie, but she stopped adoring him for some reason. (Probably b/c we're all cooped up in here. Who wouldn't get irritated with someone you're imprisoned with for a year?) So the spray may help Mellie from being anxious, but I don't think it will help Noms from trying to play with her. Unless he's doing it to be rude??? Or unless I'm totally off the mark here, and she's peeing/pooping on my bed for some other reason. Who knows. It may or may not help. We'll just have to see.

I can only interpret so much. Too bad they can't just tell me what's going on...

Speaking of limited space, Michele, a vet tech from work (but who works elsewhere now) asked me if I would move in with her. She's definitely desperate, because she has three cats and a dog - and the thought of trying to get six cats to get along isn't pleasant... She rents a condo through T's mom, her roommate kind of disappeared, stopped paying rent, etc. She's been trying to find a roommate, was thinking of buying a house, but things aren't working out. I don't think *we'd* have problems living together, as we keep to ourselves, mostly, but the pets might be an issue. My cats would be scared of her dog, our cats might not get along, somebody would probably start peeing, and who wants to clean up cat pee??? Not I.

But, I can only move out if I get another job. We'll see how this interview goes. Even if I do get a job, though, it doesn't mean I'll be able to move out right away. And how will K feel? I don't even know if she still wants to move up here...

One thing I'm all proud of myself for is remembering that even if the interview goes badly, that if I fumble for words and don't know how to answer their questions, it's not the end of the world. It sounds so cliche, but even if things don't go the way I want, maybe it's better that way. Things will be the same, and yes, we want change, but the *same* is not me dying, being tortured, living on the streets, starving, etc. It's just me trying to move along in life, seemingly a little slower than others. But that's me. I can't be anyone else, you know? Even if I try. I have to deal with the only me that I know. And sometimes, that's okay. = )